An Interrupting Cow Goes Emoo!

Even If You Always Trade, This Means Nothing To You

About 15 minutes before the Dot-Com bubble was going to burst, just before the turn of the millennium, I decided to begin investing in the equities market.  About 15 minutes AFTER the bubble had burst I realized that I did not have enough education to be an effective investor.  It was time to listen.  It was not time to talk or think or to or to play point & counterpoint with investors smarter AND more successful than me.  It was time to LISTEN!  The talking, thinking and hypothesizing were to come AFTER those more successful than me were finished talking.

Common courtesy aside, if I didn’t hear everything they said, I would not be able to do what they did.

Some Americans feel so entitled that they would rather start talking, just because they want to say what they know, instead of patiently waiting to find out if an entitlement is even necessary.  Those that are about the same age as the internet seem to think that just because the world wide web can produce instant analysis in a consequence-free environment that they can stand face with another human being and do the same thing.  They like to roll their eyes, exhale loudly, drum their fingers and irritably tap their feet.

Ask them what their problem is and they’ll say, “Nothing.”

When you read their blog later that night though, it will be an entire scenario of what they WISH would have happened.

An Incomplete Sentence Is Like Incomplete Data

Only a fool would think he or she has the prophetic ability to not only guess the final half of someone else’s statement, but also to assimilate it, formulate something in their head and then express it vocally before the original statement has been completely uttered.  If one had the ability to do that, they should also have the ability to foresee elections, horse races and winning lottery numbers.  Interrupting Cows do not have those extra abilities, they only have the ability to guess the final handful of words in a sentence spoken to them.  They do not have the ability to LISTEN to the last handful of words spoken to them.  I have tried to ask them why they don’t wait for a statement to be completed before speaking themselves, but I only got as far as, “Why don’t you…”

If you want to see an Interrupting Cow jump, talk to them about something they know next to nothing about, while they are sitting in front of a computer connected to the internet.  They will do ANYTHING to show you that ten seconds of internet reading equals ten years of actual lifetime experience.  For an even bigger laugh, try to say this sentence to the Interrupting Cow, “You can’t read something on the internet for ten seconds and hold a conversation with me on a level of my ten years of experience.” You will only get as far as, “You can’t read something on the internet…”  At that point the interrupting cow will interrupt you to tell you that they are offended that you have implied they don’t know how to read.  Since they interrupted, they’ll never realize that what you had to say has nothing to do with literacy, but lifetime experience in the real world.  So you end the conversation, attempting to explain that you were not done speaking so they have a skewed idea of what you were TRYING to say.  But an Interrupting Cow is never wrong, and has COMPLETE BLIND FAITH in their prophetic abilities, so you get interrupted again, while trying to explain that they should just listen, rather than interrupting.

The Interrupting Cow can not accept this and will say that you are trying to hold a conversation on YOUR terms!  There is nothing funnier than watching an Interrupting Cow pout, stomp and sputter around because by ending a conversation, you will have taken away their power of interruption.  What is an Interrupting Cow to do if it is not allowed to interrupt?

A Vicious Circle Of Incomplete Information Is An Interrupting Cow